Communication
Communication is about connection and understanding—making sure the message sent is the message received. Sometimes, communication also involves sharing emotional states through words, body language, and other nonverbal cues.
Once, I heard a young man’s testimony:
My father is a righteous man. He taught us many things, but one lesson he emphasized above all was: ‘Thou shalt not lie.’
One day, he discovered that a loaf of bread, which should have been in the refrigerator, had been placed in the freezer instead. He gathered all of us children at the dining table and asked, ‘Who did it?’
We sat there in silence—no one responded. He was furious and declared that no one could leave the table until someone confessed.
It turned into a long, torturous night until finally, one of his children spoke up and said, ‘Yes, I did it. Just punish me.’ Of course, she hadn’t done it—and in truth, no one really remembered who had.”
Most parents deeply love their children and genuinely want the best for them. However, many of us struggle to find the right way to communicate with them. Too often, communication breaks down due to misunderstandings and became power struggles.
Another story I came across, which I found both amusing and touching, was from a TV reality show:
A newlywed couple left their hometown to start a new life together and open a restaurant. In the beginning, life was incredibly tough. The wife recalled that every day, all she heard was her husband yelling at her. Not knowing how to respond, she stayed silent.
Then one day, she finally yelled back. To her surprise, her husband fell quiet and softly said, “I thought you didn’t care about me.”
In that moment, they both laughed—and cried.
Over time, their hard work paid off. The restaurant became a great success and earned a strong reputation in the community.
The relationship between couples is almost like rocket science—complex and unpredictable—because people are so different. Someone once said, “Only the husband and wife can make a marriage work, not a third party. Leave them alone.” In many ways, that makes a lot of sense.
I’ve also come to realize that the silent treatment is definitely not a wise way to handle conflict. Communication, even though difficult, is essential.
At work, communication is primarily done through meetings. We have all kinds of meetings: staff meetings, department meetings, all-hands meetings, and so on. In these meetings, we exchange information, ideas, and thoughts.
One particular meeting stands out. We, as information specialists, were called to a meeting by our newly hired Corporate Information Officer, who had recently been assigned to the role. The purpose of the meeting was to brainstorm ways to cut the global company budget by 5%. He had prepared beautiful PowerPoint slides on the whiteboard and talked at length. However, no one seemed particularly interested in the topic and paid little attention to what he was saying. We all sat quietly with our laptops, continuing to focus on our own work, which we felt was more important and engaging.
At one point, he asked one of the engineers for input. The engineer replied, “Our family budget is handled by my wife—I have no clue about it.” We all laughed.
The meeting dragged on and on. We watched the clock tick by—one hour, then two. As time passed, we started to get nervous. Some of us needed to pick up our children, and the meeting seemed to have no end in sight.
Finally, a female engineer spoke up and suggested, “You can just download all the expense data from the database, convert it to Excel, then massage the data and distribute it to every department to confirm that this will be their expense next year.”
The CIO jumped up in excitement. “What a brilliant idea! I’ll call you later to discuss more!”
The engineer replied, “I’m sorry, I have more important work to do at home during that time.”
I guess when we have too much knowledge and high degrees, we sometimes make simple things more complicated—especially when we lose sight of common sense. Often, we get stuck in protocols and the political world, focusing on process-driven solutions with rules, but without considering the human element.
Today’s communication is even more complicated. The majority of people are replacing traditional verbal communication—whether spoken or written—with digital forms like emails, texts, and social media. In the process, the true purpose of communication, especially in conveying feelings, is often completely lost.